Dec 202010

Being in a Scottish pirate metal band like Alestorm must have its ups and downs. On the one hand, you’ll never be considered grymm. On the other hand, if you’re in Alestorm, you get to issue press releases like this one. Can’t imagine seeing something like this from, say, Gorgoroth.

“It is my very great pleasure to announce that on January 10th ALESTORM will be heading to the studio to record our third album, which we’re gonna call ‘Back Through Time’. It’s gonna be an epic adventure through piratical badassery in 11 tracks, with more drunken singalong anthems than you can shake a stick at. There will be songs about midgets. There will be songs about Wisconsin. There will be songs about travelling through time to kill Vikings. And, of course, loads of songs about pirates doing what they do best; kicking your ass and stealing your wenches!”

And then there are the projected song titles announced by the band for the forthcoming piratical badassery:

* The Sunk’n Norwegian
* Shipwrecked (Pure Dead Banjaxed)
* Buckfast Powersmash
* Rum
* Back Through Time
* Swashbuckled
* Death Throes Of The Terrorsquid
* Midget Saw
* Scraping The Barrel
* Rumpelkombo
* Barrett’s Privateers

(more after the jump . . .)

The band also promises “a silly digipak version with a bunch of daft covers as bonus tracks as well, the exact details of which we’ll announce at a later date.”

Don’t know about you, but I liked Alestorm’s latest album, Black Sails At Midnight — at least in small doses. Knowing that the new album will include songs about midgets, Wisconsin, time travel, Viking battles — and terrorsquid — makes me almost breathless in anticipation. How ’bout you? Breathless, right?

Having gone this far, I might as well throw up an Alestorm video.  🙂

I suppose I should apologize to Andy for bumping his opus off the top spot on the site for this.  I just couldn’t resist.

Anyway, if you’re like me and you’ve been waiting for a good metal song about squid, the wait is almost over.


  1. The other pirate band (the famous one who’s name eludes me) was an opener at some show I went to a few months ago, and I wanted to kill myself for being there early. The video above has the same impact on me. Besides, anybody knows that Vikings would have killed pirates any day, pfft, they don’t even know their history.

    • Swashbuckle? If that’s the one, I saw them in Seattle earlier this year and the schtick got old after the first song. And yes, if they actually could travel back in time to fight Vikings, there would be slimy pirate guts on the floor before they could draw their cutlasses.

      • yeah Swashbuckle. I don’t remember who they opened for (maybe Belphegor) just that they were very out of place, well beyond sucking that is.

        • Sometimes, I really wonder who packages these shows. Swashbuckle and Belphegor?!? When I saw them, they were playing with Augury, Death Angel, and Soilwork. Go figure.

          • Belphegor and Swashbuckler. S&M satanists meets prancing sailors. Talk about opposite ends of the spectrum.

          • I guess there are two schools of thought, one is to package bands that are close enough that it will cause people to come out and see all of them. The other is to package a diverse set of bands in hopes that it’ll get more people to show up. My guess is that the latter is more prominent when the bands are smaller, or niche. An example would be Immolation touring a few years back with Cradle of Filth, you watch the DVD and when the camera pans out to the audience with the exception of a few fans in the front most everybody is standing around bored waiting on CoF, but it was probably the only way for the tour to break even.

            • That sounds right, and sometimes packaging un-alike bands can be a good thing, not only for the diversity of the experience but also because it can introduce you to music you might otherwise have neglected. But sometimes it means you have to endure sheer crap to hear what you came for. Much as I hate wasting money, I’ve started showing up late to hear bands I want to hear if they’re near the end of the bill, or walking out once I’ve heard them if they’re near the start, when the rest of the line-up sucks.

              • Yeah, whenever I go to a show now I call ahead and get the running order and esitmated times each band goes on and I get there for the band(s) I want to see and then leave. Most shows are priced so that I can afford to only see the band I care about. Don’t want to sound like too much of a douche but my time is far too valuable to be wasted on bands I don’t like.

                • If you’re a douche, then I’m one, too. And not only is it a waste of time, but listening to music I know I don’t like pollutes the experience of listening to the bands I want to hear. I’d rather have an untainted memory of something good . . .

  2. I’m guessing the squid in question is of the monster sort that a guy like Phro, who will go unnamed, wouldn’t want to rub up uncomfortably against.

  3. Islander, Phro is going to jump all over this. What have you unleased?

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