Oct 282011
 

Video Day here at NCS continues . . .

So far, in order, we’ve featured Metachaos, Vaulting, and Vallenfyre, and that trajectory leads naturally to . . . Baby Metal? Or is it Babymetal?

Seriously, the only reason I’m doing this is to see what kind of commentary it provokes from Phro when he emerges from his lair over in The Land of the Rising Sun. Because my reaction upon seeing this at MetalSucks was pretty much captured by Axl’s comments: “OH MY GOD SERIOUSLY YOU GUYS WHAT THE FUCKING FUCK IS THIS DID SOMEONE PUT ACID IN MY COFFEE THIS MORNING BEC I CAN’T EVEN – WHAT WHAT WHAT WHAT WHAT WHAT WHAT WHAT”

My brain is too scrambled to even come up with a sufficiently effective palate-cleanser. So instead, I’ll just show you this (after the jump) . . .

(credit/blame to byrd36 for telling me about the Baby Metal video.)

  66 Responses to “KILL ME NOW”

  1. Bwwaaahahahahahahha!

    That’s the most awesome fuckin’ set of costumes EVER!

    Also, at this very moment Don Lemon on CNN just reported that the FBI has declared elements of the ICP fanbase a “hybrid gang”. Double bwwaaahahahaha! Fuck juggalos.

    • Yessir, that daddy is bringing up his little boy right. You have to start teaching good habits early, so they’ll stick.

      ICP fanbase = hybrid gang: Yes, juggalos are hybrids, the kind whose mommas are also their sisters.

  2. I’d rather listen to this than ICP.

  3. I’m going to second Axl’s comment..the fuck did I just watch?! O.O

  4. So Slipknot decided to replace Cory Taylor with 3 japanese school girls?

  5. As I said over on TNTOB, I’ve built up an immunity against Japanese bullshit like this. However, seeing as how this video is basically a product of the Japanese Idol industry, I would just like to take the time to say that that industry is quite possibly the creepiest legal industry in the developed world. It’s basically a giant factory farm for producing pop idols, and it does so in such a way as to make Disney look ethical and full of musical and moral integrity.

  6. Yeah the Japanese are like tiny creepy midgets. It’s easier to not overthink what they like/enjoy and just assume COFFINS has a Hello Kitty collection they haven’t told us about. 🙂

    • Thanks for making the racism of Japan seem a bit more reasonable.

    • That was a lot more whiney than it should have been. I just hate the Japanese equals short stereotype because so many Japanese men are taller than me.

      • are you short?

        • Average for an American… 5’10” or 178 centimeters.

          I grant you that most Japanese men are about an inch shorter than me, but the whole super short thing bugs me. Especially if you watch any kickboxing or rugby or what not…someone of those guys are fucking big.

          I’ve met a lot of 15 year older who are just about my height too. (I used to work in the public schools. Who okayed that!?)

  7. Eh, not that weird…. I wouldn’t want to listen to it regularly, but is it worse than, say, Fergie? The sex ad music marketing thing is horrific, as Tr00 Nate pointed out, but otherwise it just reminded me of a Disney Channel Halloween Special.

  8. I totally just misread the subheader as:
    Once the boobs get cold, they lose all appeal.

  9. Should I feel bad for liking Blood Stain Child?

    http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=2oi-8xl7uZs

  10. Also, I would pay all the money I have in my wallet (much more than usual I usually have too!) to see Amon Amarth dress up like the girls and do their dance. Seriously. Let’s start a pool. I have at least $300…

    (Also, Freudian slip I corrected: I originally typed poop instead of pool.)

  11. I looked up the lyrics to this song. They, literally, make just about no sense.

    I appreciate that.

    • Yes. It would have been disappointing if the lyrics had made sense, because nothing else about this does.

      • Well, the first verse is about how cute their hair is, and the chorus is about running out of time and asking (someone) to wait for them.

        I forgot the rest, but it’s pretty goddamn random…

  12. The stupid… it burns!!!

    The only thing I can think of (at 1 AM, that is) that could top this on the crap-o-meter would be a duet between Rebecca Black and Justin Bieber, with Willow Smith whipping her hair in the background to some blast beats and downtuned guitars.

    Er, wait. I’m sure something that horrendous – even if not with the same people – exists somewhere out there.

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