Feb 132012

Sorry for the brevity and lack of originality in this post. My fucking day job is being a jealous mistress of my time. Therefore, I am just pasting in this piece of exciting news:

“Bodiless Sleeper”, a brand new song from Swedish tech-death assassins SPAWN OF POSSESSION, can be streamed at  GuitarWorld.com. The track comes off the band’s third full-length album,“Incurso”, which will be released in North America on March 13 via Relapse Records. The CD, which will contain nine tracks plus an instrumental intro, was recorded at Pama Studios in Kristianopel, Sweden with engineer Magnus “Mankan” Sedenberg.

I’m not even able to listen to this song.  So, please go listen to it, and then tell me about the explosive orgasm I’m not having. Thank you for your assistance.


  1. “So, please go listen to it, and then tell me about the explosive orgasm I’m not having.”

    You are not having an explosive orgasm.

  2. You know those massively destructive orgasms where you broke a hole through the wall, drowned your cat in semen and than ran around in circles screaming in ecstasy while your penis was acting like a demonic firehose?

    Yeah just had one of those.

    • And thank you for your assistance, too. Nothing like an imaginary explosively destructive orgasm to fell imaginarily better despite the suckage of reality, though my cat does not feel imaginarily better. I am still unable to hear the song.

      • You those non-orgasms you didn’t have because of the massive orgasm you had just an hour ago and accidentally sprayed the insides of your refrigerator, as a result of which you couldn’t drink enough water later on?
        One had one of those non-orgasms. [Oh, the pain…]

        Also, your comment seems to enforce the notion that Heavy Metal is indeed a vital component of the Life Equation:
        Imaginary Metal Song (No Metal Song) = Imaginary Explosive Orgasm (No Happy)
        Real Metal Song = Real Explosive Orgasm

    • Demonic Firehose. Huh. I have a new pet name to suggest to my wife for my penis.

      No Clean Singing. Suggesting pet names for penises since 2009.

      Well done gents.

      • How about the Great Elephant Gun?

        Or the Green Mile. (Assuming your a troll. Trolls are green, right?)

        OR! Bone Spear of Orgasmic Disappointment. Wait…I’m projecting….

  3. Meh, you’re only missing a blistering onslaught of fiery technical riffing, insanity inducing drumming, and vocals from the bowels of the great Leviathan himself, which all come together and result in a glorious supernova sized orgasm that accidentally destroyed a system of planets in the Antares region!

  4. Hey look! It’s more Mindless Wankery!

    Freaking awesome Mindless Wankery!

    Mindless Wankery all around! Cheers!

    (How has Mindless Wankery not made it to the banner yet?)

  5. Again I’m in a bar a watching basketball, so I’ll have to listen to this later. Definitely looking forward to this album, but no orgasmic ecstasy here yet either.

  6. Right. If he’s wearing a poncho, with the hood on of course, then it is a test of skill.

 Leave a Reply

You may use these HTML tags and attributes: <a href="" title=""> <abbr title=""> <acronym title=""> <b> <blockquote cite=""> <cite> <code> <del datetime=""> <em> <i> <q cite=""> <s> <strike> <strong>



This site uses Akismet to reduce spam. Learn how your comment data is processed.