A YEAR-END LIST FOR YOUSE FROM GRONK! (A BAND OF ORCS)

photo by Ray Cottle

(Wretched humies that we are, and wishing to be spared when the domination of the great dragon comes, we humbly asked A Band of Orcs if they would share with us their favorite releases of 2013, and received this response from Gronk!, verse weaver and wielder of the shamanic bass. HAIL GZOROTH!)

Us allies at No Clean Singing have ask usses for review our favorite metal tales of 2013. As Shaman of the Gore-Stained Axe Tribe, Me, Gronk!, preserve kin’s history in song, invent tales of novel exploits of tribe, and convey to all Will of Great Gzoroth, Dragon of Chaos and Fire. Hail Gzoroth! 

In short, me tell stories.  Me also study Earthrealm metal tribes’ lyrical lore, for more understand our enemies, our allies, and the realm usses find usses in.  Earthrealm Metal Tribe’s Chronicle of despair, struggle, oppression, and (sometimes) rebellion of humies’ doomed kind against the ‘oppressors’ has kept running strong this year as in years before.  Whether view of vikings (Amon Amarth), aliens (Gwar), humies fearing aliens (Voivod), America-realm patriots (Havok) or just mortal humies (Iron Reagan), the tales make clear: Domination is coming! (Or is already here?)

Great has it been a year for doom-saying apocalyptic end-of-the-world fear and longing. A Swirling, hidden terror grips humies’ hearts. Every ungreen feels so, but naming “It” a bit like try to grasp eel — more tighter youse squeeze, more quickly “It” slips through youse clawed fingers. Or youse get shocked! But still, metal minstrels try and here is Gronk!’s favorite of what thems say this year.

January.

Masters of progressive extreme, Voivod, return for set spear shaft high at start of 2013 cycle with Target Earth. Even though Piggy gone to Hall of Ancestors, him’s metal spear-brothers left behind have ably evoked the Piggy-spirit musically, with complex chords, dancing time changes, and excellent apocalyptic-tech-vs.-nature-theme, if not outright story, album.  While entire album exactly what youse expect from Voivod, Gronk! think title track, wherein they describe the doom-that-came to earth as evil ‘space avenger’ — an alien, mechano-digital, computer-virus-like horror what has power for erase humies with the push of sorcerer’s button, is my favorite visual illusion of year.  Gaze upon mastery of vision-work produced by Chaos Monger Studio to bring to life… wait no, that’s not right, to bring to unlife the technocratic, digital alien AI terror what has put earth in its sights. The vision-spell matches well Voivod’s mechanized cadence and industrial chords of smoke and desolation brought forth by axe-wielders of the band, and hopeless doom-chanting of Snake.

VoiVod “Target Earth”

 

 

February.

Humans, methinks the “Old Ones” of metal trying to tell you something. Veteran Death Metal-doomsayers Suffocation turn to ancient writings from the Eastern Realm called “Tibetan Book of the Dead” for help teach your lot in life how to deal with youse greatest fear — Death. Thems have conjured forth from chaos of thems’ minds the album called Pinnacle of Bedlam” Here the prophet known as Terrence Hobbs tells you what them thinking when forging this another brutal work of death metal mastery.

Gronk! always count on Suffocation for killer forged riffwork and demonic voices of these humans, so us turn now to words put forth both to tell what them thinking and of what they tell in song. Them make video-video for album, but Gronk! more interst in words than images on this one, so take heed of ‘lyrics’ video for

“As Grace Descends”

 

And

“Cycle of Suffering”

 

Them say Tibet but “As Grace Descends” cast this humie age’s battles as from myth book called Revelations, with reference to falls and pale horse, renouncing 7 deadly sins and whatnots.  Nonetheless, them describe destruction of land, air, and sea-see?  And thems lay out the fate of your kind here

To lose everything you thought was real
Terrified to let go of what you think you know
Can’t stop the struggling, can’t let go – collapse
Death and rebirth, the unending cycle

 

March.

Speaking of cycles, usses allies in Iron Reagan, whom usses go on tour with this past Fall to support Gwar and Whitechapel, have cycle to describe too. Them put out best thrash crossover album Gronk! hear in long time called Worse than Dead.  Many humies agree with Gronk!; they are spared. Usses (A Band of Orcs) have good fortune of listen to this collision of Nuclear Assault smashed into D.R.I. to create a tasty thrashy stew of metal goodness live almost each night for seven weeks. Them have video too. Suffocation say cycle is one of “suffering” Iron Reagan say one of “violence.” Violence always lead to suffering, so one make one base for other and the dragon eats its tale like worm Urobos, or as usses call it in Hirntoida, the great dragon of fire and chaos, Gzoroth. Hail Gzoroth! But I digest — check out Iron Reagan crushing here. Opening main riff so catchy Gronk! hear both Cretos and Pustulus Maximus play for soundcheck sometimes on tour-raid. It reminds one of the great Slayer some bit.

“Cycle of Violence”

 

But, alas, Gronk! wordsmith think humans need pay heed to words (though Gronk! know you won’t). Human-called-Tony’s language not fancy or gilded like some more dramatic doomsayers, but straightforward and heartfelt and heart worth listening to. Hear what mortal humans that think a little bit think about mundane life with other more stupid humies. No song longer than 2 minutes so not take too much of precious time humies tend to waste anyway.

Each song one fast, furious thrashterpiece that kick straight to gonads and tell YOU that all humies are all the evil that grips humie-kind. Listen to (and buy) whole album HERE:

http://ironreagan.bandcamp.com/ 

Read what Iron Reagan try to tell humies about humies HERE:

http://www.metal-archives.com/albums/Iron_Reagan/Worse_than_Dead/373929?songId=2597536

 

Many, many veteran Meistersingers of death metal have for years try to warn humies bout coming destruction at hands, brains, tentacles and spirits of hidden puppet string pullers. Voivod think menace come from outer space hackers of earth-grids. But Swedish soothsayers Hypocrisy tell in End of Disclosure” that space menace one fake thing to fool youse into conformity.  Them place blame, like many before and since them, on one very humie society of elite called New World Order.  Them say that them plan a

Fantasy invasion from the sky

Trillions o’ dollars from secret funds

Drilling cities underground

Only for the selected ones

Hold onto memory of this verse.  This theme comes back when Gronk! gets to September releases and Gwar.  End of Disclosure make for Gronk!’s favorite CD bought with gold this year, cuz it come with 15-panel poster of hideous demon-thingy, surmounted by one great pile of heads enfolded within its wings, while meditating upon humies’ ultimate demise, for to hang on my cave wall down in the depths of Orc ToweR.  It also brutal metal telling of stories Gronk! enjoys. Alas, no lyric vids but go ahead and see two vids from album.

 

 

Them tell youse in “Tale of Spineless” that youse humies is pussies and to blame for fall of humies cuz can’t stand up to oppressors.  How they say nowadays, “Seems legit.”

Them layout what them think entire plan of ‘Elite’ and tell of evil deeds like chem trails and surveillance in “The Eye.” But them also think some ‘gods’ gonna return to save humans, as told tale of in “The Return.” Maybe this one true metal tale, but Gronk! not think this will happen, for Gzoroth shall awaken to cleanse your putrid world with Fire and Chaos before any humie gods return and orcs shall inherit the earth.  But I bend my way. Gronk!’s actual favorite track not get video presentation for promo. But for sheer blend of drumming brutality, deathy malody… er, melody, and lyrical cadence Gronk! favors “United We Fall”.

Pre Chorus and chorus groove and incantation of these lines keep Gronk! coming back to chant along, and tap clawed toes, time after time.

I hate, they hate, we hate all that you stand for

I pay, they pay, we pay the price for your lies

What’s to hate about one chorus what contains so much hate, ahahaha?!?!

 

April.

Gronk! honestly not hear much music from this moon-span, but did chance to conjure digital copy of Keep of Kalessin’s Introspection EP. I-tunes call it one single, but really was a triple, since download-conjuring comes with 3 songs. But maybe too short to call one EP? Dunno. Don’t care. Humies can’t get story straight; that no surprise. What really surprise Gronk! is that some humie somewhere have ability for magic of ‘introspection.’ Orc shamans do introspection all the time and try best to teach orc-orcs how to do, but Gronk! not detect this habit in most humies in Earthrealm. But video-illusion for song start by telling what it means, this ‘introspection,’ and music sets mood and pace for some metal deep-thinking-looking-within.

 

 

Other two tunes include an instrumetal called “Flight of the Hatchling,” which you, if clever humie, guess is play on words with “Flight of the Bumble Bee”. You guess rightly; front-humie / axe-wielder Obsidian C. say as much.

Despite being verse weaver Gronk! also enjoy tribal intensity of instrumetals much a lot and this why A Band of Orcs always have one on each album.  KoK have one too on this EP.  “Flight of the Hatchling” help paint sonic picture in Gronk!’s mind of young dragon taking flight to Dominate feeble creatures of ground, and even vaguely make Gronk! remember Manowar’s cover of “Flight of the Bumble Bee.”

Thirdly, single-triple-EP-thingy come with “The Dragontower,” which really just remake of older KoK song, redone with much more many brutal drumming. Alright by Gronk!; Gronk! like brutal metal drumming and since song already have heavy distortion not much more needed to improve.  KoK’s dragon-longing endure them to orcs, us Gzoroth, Dragon-of-Fire-and-Chaos-Worshipping orcs, but sad to say to humie called Obsidian C. — It not matter. In the end, Gzoroth consume your soul too, after using you for him’s awaken on this Earthplane. Hail Gzoroth!!!!

 

May.

Claws down, Gronk!’s most favored draconian-themed story album of 2013 Suncycle comes from far away realm of India where face-painted, hooded cultists of the Mumbai Tribe known as Reptilian Death make thems’ lair. “The Dawn of Consumation and Emergence” make for brutal human-hating death metal at finest.  RD seems to name almighty Gzoroth “O” — okay, guess it not really matter what one call great dragon in this Earthrealm, it kill you anyway, ahahah!!! Still, this great story told from view of O’s mind.

 

 

Intro to fist track “PrimEval” remind Gronk! little bit of Crimson Glory’s “Where Dragons Rule”.

Remember that? Maybe not. Nevermind. This Coincidence?  Gronk! think not. Spirit of Gzoroth move through Multiverse and ages in all types of metal. Even metal sung by elves, ahahahah!!! But Gronk! digest again….

Whole album full of great, savage Gzoroth-pleasing monstrously evil guitar riffage, catchy and tackling subject matter near and deathly to orc hearts, the Domination of humanity by Gzoroth, the true evil behind humie’s fall.  Thems may call great dragon by another name but all Other-realmers recognize Gzoroth in spirit. Gronk!’s favorite riff of all on “Distorted by Bondage, Blood and Bestiality” start at 1:08 mark. Gronk! listen again and again and again to it; tapping clawed foot and banging green head. Four tusks up!!!

Humies can hear whole tale collection at Bandcamp:

http://reptiliandeath.bandcamp.com/album/the-dawn-of-consummation-and-emergence

And if you want CD in America Realm then us found it here.  Youse can too, at Old School Metal.

http://osmrecords.enstore.com/item/reptilian-death—tdocae

In truth, The Dawn of Consumation and Emergence emerges as Gronk!’s second most favored overall collection of metal tales this Cycle.

What’s Gronk!’s favorite? Patience. Gronk! getting to that. For nonce, one more deathly delectation must needs mentioning for May.

 

Immolation’s Kingdom of Conspiracy. Okay, so more human-lamenting of zombie-like mind of masses succumbing to machine of supposed leaders conspiring to kill all human race not original theme, no. No, indeed, but maybe not original cuz true? Haha, who knows? What is known: this album cover art Gronk!’s most favored of year. What’s not for orc to like with immense tower of same-same enchained humans baring mark of supposed beast on head, looking so very dismal, hopeless and mute. For humies, Mute is Best! Sadly, unlike Hypocrisy album this one not have 15-panel poster for to nail to cave wall. Drat! But human handler-label put promo videos for you to learn how youse humies succumb to extinction through submission to mind and body control.

 

 

Far as orcs concerned, not happen fast enough!

 

June.

Gronk!’s most favored album of the year is Amon Amarth’s Deceiver of the Gods.

Lyric Video “As Loke Falls”:

 

 

When Amon Amarth first release tune “As Loke Falls” some human comment that it best song them ever heard.  Gronk! agreed as song help Gronk! live-see story in green head.  Thems tell of Norse God Heimdall chop off Loke’s head, has finger-tapping guitar as rhythmic melody and no chorus.  This song NOT HAVE CHORUS, but still so brilliant, you go through anyway without repeat, repeat pattern humies so used to.  But Gronk! change mind about favored song once Gronk! get whole album.  “Shapeshifter” with Gronk!’s humble-yet-always-correct opinion is best song him ever hear by Amon Amarth.  It make perfect balance of brutality and melody in song and has chorus, but please Gronk! much, especially part where drums drop from double bass to straight beat and Skald-known-as Johan say:

My words are poison to your ears

I say the words you fear

Still you know that it’s the truth you here

Ragnorok is growing near

Wait?  So Tibetan Book of Dead, Revelations, and Norse Skalds tell youse Domination is coming?  Curiouser and curiouser.

Amon Amarth paint mind pictures with words, chords, and melodies and must be modern incarnation of skalds in Earthrealm.  Gronk! never hear song-song by Amon Amarth him not like, though, truth be told, so him very happy this album come this year. Hail Gzoroth!!!

 

The force of thrash metal strong this year and Havok’s Unnatural Selection one manual on how America realm patriots can understand why thems’ country about to fall. Them say to youse, youse not warrior enough to stand for America Tribe values and have let liars (Loke) cloak true meaning and turn thems into nation of cowards.  The Domination is coming!  But Havok say this to you and here is lyric video for

“Give Me Liberty…or Give Me Death”

 

Not that it help.  Youse ignore and going on eating crap fed to youse heart, mind, and body but don’t say thems not try and warn you.  If Gore-Stained Axe Tribe want to be ‘sportsman-like’ and give humies one fighting chance against ultimate death, this might make most important video of year, but we know youse not pay attention anyway, so as for orcs, usses be waiting for youse to die and then we shall inhabit the Earth with our Tribe, Hail Gzoroth!!!

 

August.

Gronk!’s favorite band he’d never heard of until NCS asked him to write this article is 8 Foot Sativa

“The Shadow Masters”

 

Haha, Gronk! think it funny that giant sativa man super hero battle New World Order, haha!!!  But even this contain secret meaning of how maybe… maybe… not hold your breathing… humies can save humies selves. No, Gronk! does not own this album, yet, but me plan on buying it as soon as gold supply freed up for spending on non-Domination thingys. This video make Gronk!’s second favored of year, behind VoiVod’s “Target Earth”.  It tell same story Havok try to tell youse, but this time from the Land of New Zee and bout whole Earthrealm not just Americarealm.  Again, to kNOw avail as it fall on deaf human ears.  Say, Gronk! think him just come up with name for next orc album: “Waiting for Man to Die”.  Us not even have to lift one sword, axe, or spear blade or waste provision in one full-scale invasion cuz youse do it yourselfses.

 

September.

Us alien allies in Gwar release one REAL story-album called Battle Maximus in this mooncycle. Gronk! love this album, because Gronk! love story albums such as King Diamond like to make. Gwar personify the forces spoken of in Hypocrisy’s End of Disclosure, or Immolation’s Kingdom of Conspiracy, or the affore-said 8 Foot Sativa’s The Shadow Masters, the elite, as one cosmic time-traveling asshole named “Mr. Perfect” and his ‘perfect’ asshole followers.  In story album, Gwar pit themselves against Mr. Perfect and hims’ forces of gene-meddling oppressive lackies, who hunt, experiment, torture, and kill humies and others for fun and science.  This verse from “Swallow the Sun” tie together theme of Elite-Mr.-Perfect going underground shared by Hypocrisy, Immolation, and others this Cycle.

They created life

It should never be that way

A bill for you to bare that they never meant to pay

They went underground

It was really rude

Because they took all the girls and the guns and food

Stem cells and cloning and fucking an ape

If it’s for science how can it be rape

Also, Gwar use album for pay tribute to fallen brother Flattus Maximus, especially, the instrumetal that is the title track “Battle Maximus”.  New Axe brother Pustulus Maximus shreds and all Maximus clan aliens that contribute to album shred too, making Battle Maximus album pleasing to Gronk! in every way–Music and Story. Hail Gzoroth!!!  Gronk! spend all tour trying to figure whether “Swallow the Sun” or “Bloodbath” Gronk!’s favorite song.  Still not sure.  But Gronk! think that most important line from album is from song “Mr. Perfect” that they not play this tour.

I swear defiance

And non-compliance

To the bloody black flag

Of the United State

Of Death

And to the Abyss

By which we stand

We defy you

We deny you

As you spread ignorance and futility to all

Lack of knowing and hopelessness if you DO know shall be your doom, humies.  Lest you think, humies, that Oderus Urungus and his humie slave Dave not serious about this, let me assure you him is.  Think on that.  Him speak not just of Scum-dog kind, but humie kind and all sentient kind.  Mr. Perfect and all Perfect stand for is one violent force of lies, what must needs be defied.  But humies won’t, so us orcs no need worry. You lack Will.  Hail Gzoroth!!!

 

Gronk! have much, many albums look forward to in 2013.  Satyricon’s Satyricon one such. Gronk! note that many humies not like Satyricon’s change of music direction, but Gronk! think if band sound same-same each and every album, then that not in line with Principle of Chaos, therefore not of Gzoroth.  Satyr and Frost manage for change music point on compass some bit, but retain still mastery of unmuted riffage and poetic verse that pleasing to green ears and ham Gronk!, I am.  In song “Phoenix” featuring guest vocals by one spared Norwegian pop-star Sivert Hoyem, Satyricon seem to diagnose problem facing humies that clear for all to see who that observe youse doomed kind from outside.

Slave to some Wretched

Old Imagination of

Yesteryear

All that Grows in the 

Skulls of the Living Are

Flowers of Fear

Again, Gronk! not expect hypnotized humies to make connect of slavery to fear, so Domination rolls on!  Be afraid!  Be very afraid!  It good for business.

Anyway, here all Lyric Videos released for album.

 

 

Next, Gronk! just like to say that hometown vortex of Santa Cruz hardcore legends Bl’ast! have two releases in September worthy of humies listen.  One Dave Grohl’s remix of classic 1987 album It’s in My Blood, which humies can hear here:

http://www.spin.com/articles/blast-blood-dave-grohl-southern-lord-album-stream-black-flag-sst/

This album of chaotic time and heartfelt angst heralded what come known later as modern hardcore with weird chords and time changes, so worth hear-hear just to see what come before. Also, Bl’ast! find old, dusty never released mastertape in abandoned warehouse that Dave Grohl also mix and release through Southern Lord Records called simply:

Blood!

Humies can hear one song and buy whole album on Bandcamp

http://blastsl.bandcamp.com/releases

It funny to Gronk! that song “Tomorrow” for free listen at bandcamp about how none able to turn back time, but yet, Bl’ast! turn back time some by discovery of long-lost mastertapes, no? Anyway, Gronk! Bl’ast! fan when very young orc and rejoice that Gzoroth allow humies unearth lost work and Gronk! want you rejoice too and support Bl’ast! so them play more live shows.

Now, back to regularly scheduled declamations of doom and apocalypse.  Hail Gzoroth!!!

 

Orctober.

Gronk! admit him not listen much to Kataklysm until front-humie approach orcs about management, but when approached, Gronk! go listen for self to see what kind of humie want support orc.  Gronk! like what him hear on Prevail and Heaven’s Venom so Gronk! accept deal (Hail Gzoroth, not long after us tour with Gwar) and look forward to new album Waiting for the End to Come.  Me not disappointed with latest work and glad to spare allies in Kataklysm! Same-same as Amon Amarth, Kataklysm able to balance brutal and melodic elements to create metal alchemy.  And like Hypocrisy, Immolation, Gwar, Suffocation, and others this year, them accuse the elite of fall of humie kind.  Indeed, Kataklysm openly declare intention to “Kill the Elite”.

Kill the elite

Darkness falls upon us

Kill the elite

We are the light of rebellion

The end of your greed, the end of your control

These chains will break, unleash the beast of humanity

Set me free

Finally, some humie decide to stand up for self and kind.  Wait? Why us allies again?  Orcs want humies to die, right?  Hold on, gotta think bout this some more.  Nevermind. I digest again…

…Gronk! also note that In particular cover of Sacred Reich’s “American Way” is good and brutal and catchy. It seem to Gronk!, though, that Kataklysm call on Gzoroth, by calling on “Fire” to destroy enemies.  See here:

“Fire” Lyric Video

 

Okay, so maybe that why us allies, Kataklysm invoke Gzoroth and therefore spared… Hail Gzoroh!!!

 

Orctober also see release of Gwar’s truck driver called Jim’s band Occultist’s album Death Sigils. The rune of death cast for frost jarl on our own album, so naturally Gronk! curious bout these “Death Sigils” and download.  It a very thick gruel of blackened-thrash-crust-punk-metal stuff.  With female gruntings and riffage as well as male screamings.  Not really have chance to examine words, but find the metalocity level high and tunes quite groovy and pleasing.  Listen here:

http://occultist.bandcamp.com/album/death-sigils

 

November.

Sometimes Gronk! miss the deep, dark, vast forests of Hirntodia before usses great battles against giants, elves, humies and dwarves burned world and took them away.  When such longing comes to Gronk! him turn to band him discover through No Clean Singing last year, Oak Pantheon, and thems’ 2012 work called From a Whisper.  So Gronk! have savage joy to find them actually have new release in 2013! Them make split with band called Amiensus that Gronk! never hear before.  Gronk! finds Oak Pantheon able to evoke vast hinterlands with musical style and lyrical paintings and latest song does so once more.  Them even offer some small hope for humies dark times.

Rejoice in tragedy

Pure dark night before the dawn

“A Gathering” Lyric Video

 

Bandcamp page:

http://oakpantheon.bandcamp.com/album/gathering

As for the other band Gronk! never hear before.  It obvious them adhere to the Wizard Crawly’s philosophy.  See for selves.

Amiensus “Arise” Lyric Video

 

Thems echo Kataklysm’s call to action for humies, but Gronk! know humies not listen, hahahaha!!!!

Grasp ahold of life’s every chance 

Defend your honor, your love, your life 

Now is the time to arise, a beckon to the gathering.

 

Oh, Gronk! sees usses allies in Exmortus have new album come 2014 and release “Immortality Made Flesh” 7 inch with this video to help promote, so usses take advantage and help promote here too.  Why?  Because Exmortus live always make delight in Gronk!  Them masters of thems axes and wield their weapons with smiles on faces.  True warriors and spared when the Domination comes.

“Immortality Made Flesh”

 

This make Gronk!’s most anticipated of early next Cycle to wrap up. Gronk! not hear anything come December him like.  Wait!  Gronk! almost forget.  Long before the false profits known as ADM came along there was Arnocorps.  Them do kickstarter campaign that Gronk! support to put out The Fantastic EP.  Them a rescue team not assassins, but neverthemore usses allies with them, for our first raid ever in Earthrealm was with them.  Not remember when EP released but sometime in 2013 Cycle.  Arnocorp play action-adventure-hardcore-rock-and-roll and set out to reclaim their Austrian folklore heritage from the bastardizations of Hollywood.  This time round thems music focus on cousin Arnold’s portrayal of ancient tales such as about Conan, Red Sonja, Hercules and… “Exactly.”  Wait, that not an Arnold movie.  No, but favorite song on EP.  It one manual for building a warrior true.  Gronk! also like that cover art match style of cover art of ancient “Conan” tomes by Robert E. Howard.

Clever!  Arnocorps retelling of classic tales get Gronk! through weapons training and strength forging with bit of rare humor that serve as cosmic relief.  You can get yours here:

http://www.arnocorps.com/gear/

Okay, that completes serpent eat tale cycle of Gronk!’s most favored of 2013.  By the by, youse all doomed! Until the Domination, Orc on and hail Gzoroth!!!!