Oct 092011

(Phro’s first Box O’Poops installment met with such an enthusiastic response that he decided to do another one for us. Actually, to be brutally honest, I don’t think anyone read it but him and me, and I didn’t have any choice in the matter. But we goin’ with it anyway!)

Well, hello there, my scat-covered-in-cum-munching friend. How’s the poop today? Did you enjoy the way I lightly browned it in your mom’s cooker? I wouldn’t recommend eating at home for a while.

Well, I decided to do another installment of Box O’ Poops! Why? Because I love you and your pure, unbridled happiness is all I desire in this world. And, because, ya’ know…POOP!!!

Seriously, you know how monkeys like to throw their poop? Y’all are like poop-throwing-monkey groupies who hang around outside the monkey cage at the zoo waiting for the monkeys to fling their poop at dumb jocks wearing too much Axe buddy spray (yah, that’s right, buddy spray). Then, you jump on the shit-covered assholes who smell like shit (but not because of the monkey shit (Axe body spray smells horrific, is my point (I just really hate Axe body spray, I’m not even sure why… (In fact, I don’t know if I’ve ever even smelled it. But the commercials sure are stupid. (And I am all for hating products based on their commercials. (That’s kind of why I hate Taco Bell. (Seriously, Fourth Meal?? What the fuck?? (I got’cher fourth meal right here in my ass cannon, buddy! (And now we’re full-circle back to poop-throwing!))))))))

Paranthetic clauses are awesome! So is munching on scat from a necroplushiphilia orgy! And then washing it down with a shot of santorum. (Google it? Don’t Google it? Either way, you’re worse of for knowing it exists.)

To the POOOOOOOOOOPS!!! (uh, yeah, more after the jump . . .)

I need to get myself one of those little dustbusters too….

Elevator Music!

I bet this reminds all of you of your first kiss…

Love your country and look good doing it!

I’ve been looking for….Hasselgrind!!!

Long Haired, Tattooed ****** Freaks….oddly, they don’t seem to be talking about you freaks.

And you thought the Wormrot video was brutal…this shit will make your cock bleed.

EDITOR’S NOTE: If you’re confused, that’s because you didn’t realize you were supposed to click on Phro’s hand-made poop images. Or maybe you’re just confused, in general.

  25 Responses to “BOX O’POOPS! (No. 2)”

  1. I just realized that my last one was kinda sexist for saying it’ll make your “cock” bleed. I should have said it’ll make your “genitals” bleed, since not all readers necessarily have cocks.

    I realize you’re probably reading that in a super sarcastic voice and imagining me rolling my bloody eyes, but I am serious. My bad.

    Now, go play with the poops!

  2. The Disentomb shirt is VERY cool. Must get. Also, I thought I was the only person who used a dustbuster that way. The male vibrator.

    I made sure I wasn’t drinking anything when I went through these links, but I still choked on my own spit when i came to the first kiss video.

    And that last video? 50+ million hits?!? I’m going to hunt you down like a dog, decapitate you with a hacksaw, and fuck your bleeding neckstump.

    Ha ha. I kid. Just kidding. Honestly. What’s your address?

    • Disentomb have their album on bandcamp. I got it there and it was worth every Australian dollar I paid.

      The kiss video was originally shown to me by my much better half.

      As for the last bit…I’m just trying to share my suffering. I think they may literally be the most popular thing over here right now. Look them up on Wikipedia and marvel at how horrific the whole thing is.

      Wait…you already have my address from the shirt………

      Please don’t show up and kill me when I get home this week. I have so little to live for, but still.

  3. Thanks Phro! Your BOX O’ POOPS was better than a glass of Metamucil and the double fiber bread my mom bought me.


    Seriously though, somewhere deep inside of my alcohol corroded intestines I somehow, maybe just a teeny weeny little bit liked that AKB48 song, oh gawd WTF is going on?! All these unfamiliar feelings bubbling within the core…

    Oh and I actually lol’d, in the full meaning of it, on that anime kiss vid. Oh the memories, tasty memories…

    • I hate AKB48 so much it makes my dick swell and anus pucker. I chose that song for torture purposes only. And it’s doctor porn that is broadcast daily in very public places all over Japan.

      Tasty! I giggled.

  5. The ‘Hoff FTW!

  6. My brain hurts now.

    No offense Phro, but I think there are days when I need to skip the stuff you write. Most of them end in ‘y’.

    • Your lips say “OH, GOD, NOOOOOO!”, but your eyes say “HOLY FUCK! YES!”

      Your penis doesn’t seem to have much to say on the matter though…


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