Jan 062012

At the moment, I’m not able to stream the new Napalm Death song that just premiered. I’m currently moving stealthily among the many secret locations I use to avoid detection by paparazzi who are hoping for something like a candid shot of me sunbathing in a thong.

Actually, I’m just commuting right now and my internet connection is too slow for streaming. I have more sympathy for the tender sensibilities of the human race than to be caught dead in a thong. Plus, it seems like it would impair my already impaired ability to concentrate to have a line of fabric up my butt crack. I’m afraid the next time the cops pull me over and ask if I know how fast I was going, I’d blurt out: “Fuck no! All I can think about is what’s trying to cut through my butt crack like razor wire!” I don’t know how chicks do it, wearing thongs, not that I’m complaining about that, mind you.

Where was I?  Oh yeah — there’s a new Napalm Death song streaming from their next album, Utilitarian, which will be released on February 27 in Europe and February 28 in North America via Century Media Records. I can’t stream it right now, but when I got an e-mail from TheMadIsraeli alerting me to the stream, he added this pithy message: “All I can say is fuck me with a buzz saw.” That seemed like a positive review, so I’m posting this alert.

The song isn’t called “Fuck Me With A Buzz Saw”. It’s called “Leper Colony”, and it premiered earlier today at Brooklyn Vegan. So go over there and give it a listen, and then please come back here and let me know if it fucked you like a buzz saw. Thank you in advance.


  1. I would say buzzsaw fuckery is a very apt summary, or having razor wire dragged up your ass crack, that’s enough to make me clench all week.

  2. Buzzsaw fuckery indeed. Oh, it hurts so gooooooood!

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