Just a heads up to the NCS faithful that things are going to be quieter than usual around our metallic island today and tomorrow. Today is my birthday (please hold your applause), and to celebrate that glorious event Ms. Islander and I are leaving early this morning for the four-hour drive to Kalaloch on the Pacific coast of Washington, about 35 miles south of Forks (yes, that Forks — where the Twilight movies were filmed). It will be my first visit to Washington’s Pacific coast (which is proof that I don’t get out much). We’ll be driving back Monday night.
The park service cabin where we’re staying has no TV, no phones, and most importantly . . . no internet access. That means no blogging for yours truly, no ability to respond to comments on our posts, no ability to receive or answer e-mails. I’m already experiencing withdrawal symptoms and we haven’t even left yet.
I have a couple of posts in the works. If I can get them finished soon, I’ll schedule one to appear today and one to appear on Monday, so we don’t break our streak of adding at least one post per day on every day since NCS debuted in November 2009. But those two posts are all we’ll have here until Tuesday.
Since I’m thinking about milestones today, here are some statistics from Google Analytics about NO CLEAN SINGING: Since we started NCS, we’ve had 450,640 unique visitors to the site from 201 different countries and territories and a total of 1,328,203 page views. 43% of the total visits to our site have come from people in the U.S., with the rest of our top 10 locations (in order) being the UK, Canada, Australia, Germany, Finland, Sweden, France, The Netherlands, and Italy. Over the last 30 days, we’ve had 37,656 unique visitors and 100,222 page views.
Well, enough with the stats. I’ll miss you guys while I’m gone. But I should have scenes like the one at the top of this post and the ones below to console me in my NCS homesickness. Yeah, I’m a dick for posting these pics, but if I can’t be a dick on my birthday, when can I?
Okay, you may now applaud.
Pfffft. Like you were born. Whatever. WE SEE THROUGH YOUR LIES, HEADLESS DEMON MONSTER!!!
I don’t leave for another hour, so I saw what you did. I was born, I tell you! I still have the fragments of my leathery birth shell to prove it.
And just to prove I have no hard feelings over being branded a liar, I have this for you:
You know what, I accept your claims as true now.
Only a creature born of a human would know how to manipulate me so.
Happy birthday, Glorious Leader!
Thank you Phro. I now feel so kindly toward you that I am sending you this, because even though it’s my birthday, it is still better to give than to receive.
Better to give than to receive…..
Is that an anal sex joke?
Happy birthday. Like your blog, and you’re a stand up dude.
Enjoy the trip.
Thanks Max. And for others who may be reading these comments, Max passed a milestone recently, adding the 50th label to his blog’s list of metal labels on Bandcamp, who collectively have brought a total of 2067 albums to Bandcamp. Amazing.
Yep… don’t know where I’d be without that list of labels. Thanks for all the hard work, Max! And congrats on the milestone.
Safe tidings, youngling. May you find your head on this new journey!
Do seek out the cobweb trees and capture them with an image-capturing contraption too!
Thanks man. It was a great trip and I took many photos, but alas, did not find my head.
I know you can’t see this right now… (well, you’re reading this right now because you’ve recently returned, so yeah I guess you can) but happy birthday! I assume you’re around the age of 3,475 year.
An old God. God damn it I was right!
Thanks for the birthday wishes dude. You’re a little light on the age, though.
I love hearing about stats and whatnot! It’s great to see how well the site is doing. Do a regular post.
Also, Happy Birthday my friend!
Thank you Gaia, much appreciated.
Ok guys, now that he’s gone… time for a coup!!!
Long live No Clean Synnging!!!
How do you plan to handle the loris horde?
They shall be use to feed the people of the glorious republic of Synntopia. It shall be our national dish!
Does that make you a President? Can I be your foreign “relations” adviser?
No, I don’t like titles that elevate me above my fellow man. A simple “God-King” will suffice.
This is insufferable! I turn my back for two days and I return to find an insurrection in progress! I sentence you to twenty lashes. It may sting a bit since the lorises will be using a crowbar instead of a whip. They are definitely NOT amused by the idea of becoming the national dish of Synntopia.
Funniest thing I’ve heard all day probably. Now, I don’t think that’s saying much since it’s 12:17 AM here on the East Coast, but you get what I mean… it was really funny.
Pah, I eat crowbars for breakfast.
For the iron content.
Did I mention that the lorises are also planning a crowbar colonoscopy for you?
Did I mention I killed all the Lorises while you were away?
Seriously, I’m like an animal. You leave me alone without stimulation for too long and I just start to kill things.
You need to check your lense prescription dude. You slaughtered a horde of pre-schoolers at Lori’s Daycare. S’okay though, pre-schoolers are a dime a dozen. But you’ve really got the loris horde stirred up. I think they’re babbling something like “This Means War!’ Count your days. At the rate the loris pack moves, you’ve only got about 20 years to live before they reach England.
If it helps I’ll meat them halfway. Their fur shall make lovely garments.
Have a good b’day and enjoy the trip, it is beautiful out, give me a horns-up as you pass through Sequim. \m/
I threw the goat a few times as we passed through Sequim (twice). As we came back through late this afternoon, the sun was shining on the bay, and it was beautiful. The whole trip was really amazing.
Too late at this point, but have a good birthday man.
Nice to know people your age can still get out and go places
Thanks for the good wishes. When you travel by ambulance with extra oxygen canisters, you can really go almost anyplace.
Have a great birthday Islander.
Always knew you were a closet Twilight freak.
PS. That fist picture looks like a shot straight out of “The Goonies”.
Man, it seemed like every other business we passed in driving through Forks has incorporated the “Twilight” name into their signage. Barfy. Also, I saw Bella’s pickup truck, still festooned with flags from the 4th of July parade. Bella, however, was not in it.
My wife is a Twilight fan. I am not. However, to keep peace within the family, I’ve watched all the movies. I didn’t hate them, but still, those are some hours I sure wish I had back.
I too have made that sacrifice for marital peace. I will play the part of the dutiful husband and escort my wife to the last movie this fall, content in the knowledge that I will get laid after the movie. It’s that knowledge that gets me through.
HA! The problem I’ve got is the sneaking suspicion that my wife would be thinking about Taylor Lautner the whole time. 🙂
I guess since I will be thinking about choking out Kristin Stewart, it’s only fair for her to think about Mr. Lautner.
Oh shit, that was funny.
You old motherfucker.
Just think of all the (filthy) things you can do in a cabin with no connection to the outside world.
Okay. I thought of all those things. What do I do next?
Happy anniversary of the day you were spat forth from the womb of Hel!
And have a great trip, O Great Leader! We await your return! (we might conquer Poland in your name while you’re away)
Thank you man. How did things go in Poland?
Those Poles gave me a tougher fight than I anticipated. I lost 5000 good men, 10,000 bad men, and my gold watch! The campaign was a failure!