May 072013

Before diving into the subject of this post, let me make one thing clear:  I do not understand why metal blogs spend print on Emmure’s Frankie Palmieri. The writers I have in mind do not listen to Emmure. Most of their readers do not listen to Emmure. Frankie Palmeri is not an interesting person. Therefore, why write about him? The only answer I can think of is that he’s easy to make fun of, because he says ridiculous things. Seems like a waste of space to me. Now, having gotten that off my chest, I’ll move on and write about Frankie Palmeri.

By way of background, Emmure are touring Europe at the moment. So are The Atlas Moth — a band whose music I like a lot. The Atlas Moth have been stopping at venues where Emmure have previously stopped. Upon finding Emmure stickers and assorted tags at these venues, The Atlas Moth have been defacing them with drawings of dicks, because, well, The Atlas Moth think Emmure sucks. This has led to a war of words with Frank Palmeri, which is sort of like going to war with a cockatoo. Things that sound like words come out, but they don’t make much sense.

Yesterday (May 7), while performing in Moscow, Franki Palmeri received an electric shock while in the middle of a song, a shock that was powerful enough to knock him straight down and out cold. Obviously, a dangerous situation that could have been worse, though Palmeri has recovered and is already making PR hay out of the incident.

And finally I come to the subject of this post. In a display of creative genius, Cris Bissell, the drummer for a Wisconsin band named Orwell, created a music video, pairing up a continuous loop of film showing Palmeri getting zapped to The Atlas Moth song “Holes in the Desert” (which is a killer song). I found this to be funny as shit. Why? 

Well, to be brutally honest, I guess it’s because I think Franki Palmeri is an embarrassing buffoon AND because he seems to have recovered from his on-stage electrocution (it wouldn’t be so funny f he hadn’t) AND because I dig “Holes in the Desert”.

As for why I’m posting about this video, which is really not the kind of thing we would normally do here, I plead guilty to the charge of rank hypocrisy. And with that, here’s the video. While you watch it, I’m going to change out of my pee-soaked shorts, and then I’ll be right back.

(via Nefarious Realm)

Okay, I’m back.

There actually is one completely worthwhile side  benefit of messing with this Cris Bissell video: I discovered Orwell’s music, which I think is fuckin’ killer. Here’s a song called “In Crude, I Remain”, which is the second track on the band’s 2011 album, AVOHFASIH. Check out Orwell on Facebook here:



  1. Fun fact: AVOHFASIH was produced and engineered by our old pal Steve Henninsgard of Iron Thrones, and former Iron Thrones vocalist Adam Clemans provides guest vocals on ‘In Tides, I Wake’. Steve told me about it back in the day, which is how I first heard them. Good album.

  2. That Orwell record was one of my favorites of whatever year it came out (2011?). Haven’t jammed that thing in awhile. Thanks for the reminder.

  3. I heard Or well a month or two back. They are outright catchy and seems to have taken a permanent space up in my playlist..

  4. Orwell kicks ass, cool dudes, great performers, get their album AVOHFASIH, badass album!!!!

  5. i really, really hope this site doesn’t turn into another Metalsucks. i’ve been having such a blast discovering new music, here.

  6. I thought false love in real life (I think that’s the one with the stuttering vocal line and the video with the swinging light bulb) was an alright song every once in a while.

    bring it on bitches.

  7. The fuck is with the hate for Emmure? They fuckin kick ass.

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