EDITOR’S PREFACE: No, I don’t normally give a shit what appears on MTV’s “Guy Code” Blog. Until last week I didn’t even know the thing existed, and now I’ll try to forget that it does. But an article that appeared there on January 29 has been splashed around metal circles in the interhole (e.g., a re-post by Dying Fetus on Facebook), so it was kind of hard to ignore. Regrettably, I read it. It can be summed up as follows:
More “hot ladies” are showing up at hardcore and metal shows than ever before. This is further evidence that “metal and hardcore music no longer solely appeals to angry misanthropic males with poor social skills.”
“The internet has helped demystify extreme music, making it more accessible and less intimidating. A girl can watch clips from a Napalm Death concert and see that it’s not so scary after all, which makes her much more likely to attend.”
“It can be easy to pick up a woman at such a concert if you follow a few quick preparation tips.”
And I won’t bother with the tips.
Late last week I saw a reaction to the article, and to comments about the article, by Shannon Void on her FB page. Shannon hails from Philadelphia and is the owner/psychic doomstress of Anthropic Records, home to such fine bands as Hivelords and Sadgiqacea. I liked what Shannon wrote and the way she wrote it. I asked her if I could post it here at NCS. She agreed. Here it is:
So, this MTV article. I have been stewing over it for a couple days. The article is shit and most people know it. The thing that resonates with me right now is really the responses people are posting on it. Yes, great, you have more of a 1% chance of getting laid when there are more women at a show. Great. We are all happy for you. I wasn’t aware that being part of the scene was about that, but, great. I am glad your penis is happy, finally.
Ladies, yes, it’s great that you are attending more shows because, for most of my life, it’s been pretty null and void in the lady department. The bothersome part is that there are women posting about it, talking about how they aren’t as “educated” on the subject of metal or they are new to the scene and people should be more accepting of them, and they shouldn’t have a problem with the article because it’s cool that they are hanging out. Yes, great! I want you to give your money to bands. Yes, great! I want there to be higher attendance at shows so bands can actually, maybe, eat on the road while they are on tour. Yes, thank you!
The thing is, the article is dripping in the sexism that people like me have worked really hard to overcome. And continue to do so. So, I understand how you don’t get why people are upset. Because you are being handed the golden ticket. The free ride. Do I want you to have problems or be faced with blatant sexism while attending a show? Of course not. But I would like for you to shut the fuck up about it and maybe think on a higher level than what MTV is handing you. I also would like for you to at least put your own patches on your jacket instead of leaving it to Urban Outfitters.
The truth is, metal is trending right now. Great. I want it to trend. I want GQ magazine to talk about black metal like it’s a novelty. I want it to trend so that what we are doing can create earthquakes below. We are going to keep doing what we do. And doing it well. I want the shit to get weeded out so that when the shit is gone, we still remain.
The reality of metal is, no matter how trendy or how shunned it is, we are all still doing it. And that, that right there, is something you will never understand or get fully educated on. So, yes, come out. Let me milk you for merch sales. Let me wave my girly looking t-shirts at you so you can sport it all over town. Bring your checkbook. Bring your friends. Bring your fucking hot mother out. I know at least 10 dudes that will try to bang her. Buy beers. Buy shots. Make us rich so we can pump all our money right back into doing exactly what we do. Metal.
As is always true, we welcome your comments (and I’ll be surprised and disappointed if we don’t get some reactions to this post!).
I’m glad these topics are coming up more and more and that there is a conversation going on about it. There has been a large outcry in the comic book community recently about the sexist behavior female fans and creators have been experiencing over the years and now with so many eyes on it and so many people coming forward I feel like it has a shot at getting better. The same with the metal community.
I think the article in question is idiotic and sexist, and then my second thought is that its a post from a jackass on MTV. So really, when you consider the sourcem there is no need for outrage. On a somewhat related note, a lot of times there are more girls at shows now because of metalcore/scene shit then any other reason. If you go to purely metal as fuck shows you still won’t see a ton of chicks and that’s fine. Also this article is also wrong in saying if a chick is at a metal show she probably isn’t with a dude, we all know this is largely horseshit. Not totally horseshit, but my estimate would be probably 60% of the time a chick at a metal show is there with a guy. Unless as stated metalcore/scene/local shit is on the bill. Which is in itself a generalization, I know some true metalhead chicks, the girl I’m seeing being one, but overall it’s more true then not to say.
My only qualm with all this (y’know, aside from the sexism) is that people seem to think that wanting to meet a girl at a show necessarily means wanting sex rather than a relationship. Obviously that’s naive, but no fucks are given.
Again, consider the source man, that’s what MTV says, and again, what the fuck do they know. Ironically some chicks at shows are there to fuck….but usually dudes in bands, not fellow attendees. I don’t knock it, I’ve seen it happen/heard it from my buddies in touring bands.
So wait a minute…do you mean to say that the channel that’s making Miley Cyrus happen has dumb ideas about women and music? My world has been rocked.
This man just won the comment thread…
Which could be much more intellectual.
I surrender. Whatever witty comment I was going to think up won’t be as good as this.
Did MTV start playing music again?
I think you’re asking the wrong crowd.
Urgh… “it can be easy to pick up a woman at a concert”…
Because, as we all know, women are simple creatures with nary a sentient though in their heads. A few simple steps will bamboozle their usual survival skills so that, no matter how socially retarded and misogynistic you are, you too can fool them into copulating with you.
The poor things.
Urgh. Fuck that. Fuck the whole unpleasant subtext of the article. Fuck the whole “men pick up chicks, chicks don’t really have much honest choice in the matter” attitude. Fuck all of it.
Now I’m really tempted to write a blog post on “How to pick up a guy at a metal concert!” Because hey, ladies, the goods may be odd, but the odds are good!
(I did once have a rather drunken woman offer to set me up with my pick of the guys at a Bolt Thrower show. She’d eloquently described the virtues and defects of a few of them before I managed to break in with the information that I was happily married and therefore not looking. Perhaps Heavy Metal Matchmaking should be a thing.)
“the goods may be odd, but the odds are good”
That is just a goddamn fantastic turn of phrase.
It really is. I can’t take credit for it – it’s how all my gal pals who went to engineering schools describe their college dating life.
It’s still a goddamn fantastic turn of phrase. 🙂
As an engineering school dude, I find this offensive!
Also, pretty accurate >_>
But if taking a girl out to the library to study some sweet thermodynamics isn’t romantic, then what is?!
Considering that I met my husband when we were lab partners in physics class, I must agree!
Science – it works!
I thought boxing was the sweet science. If I’d only known about thermodynamics!
Maaan, back in college, I used to help them girls from Economics faculty with probabilities theory, mainly to socialize with girls for a change. Also, I used to trawl for food at the humanities faculty dorm, fixed computers in exchange.
So, science and technology skills, very useful.
It conveys so much so succinctly and memorably. I’m jealous of minds that can come up with stuff like this.
Wait… so where are me and my girlfriend supposed to stand at the concert so guys don’t think we’re available? I’m so confused. Apparently I’ve been going to concerts for all the wrong reasons.
Apparently, the ladies room is your best bet.
If there is one thing we know, it’s that women are definitely not going to these shows because they enjoy the music or the scene, and – thus – the only logical conclusion you can come to is that they are playing a numbers game to get laid; the only logical reality.
Right, because loud, aggressive, abrasive music and really heavy, slow, melodic music and, well, all of metal, can only possibly appeal to a person with nuts.
Honestly, I hate how the ladies seem to camp the front row at the local club’s gigs, only to stand there still & quiet with a smartphone in their hands recording. When instead, you could have your average smelly, hairy, big-ass metal fan going crazy!
Secondly, I couldn’t help to smirk at “metal is trending”. Then again every trend hits this part of the world with years of delay.
It actually does seem like metal is trending here in the trendy old US, at least judging by all the thoroughly non-metal web sites, newspapers, and magazines that are talking about it. Kind of makes me nauseous and happy at the same time. But mainly nauseous.
Since metal is already rather everyday and popular(by this I don’t mean the trvest & kvltest necessarily), it would be interesting to see a metal trend increase in Finland.
YEAH THIS IS HOW I NORMALLY HAVE TO PICK UP WOMEN BECAUSE THIS IS THE VOLUME THAT I USUALLY TALK AT SO METAL SHOWS ARE PERFECT FOR ME!
Maybe it’s because I’m innocent/ignorant/not legally allowed to enter bar gigs, but I’ve honestly never seen anyone of any gender “picked up” at a metal concert.
The whole idea seems strange to me. Might as well write “How to Pick Up Ladies at the Movie Theater!” It’s a fucking metal concert. Odds are the women who are there are also there to rock the fuck out. Can’t we all just rock the fuck out together?
Was about to post a similar sentiment. Pretty much sums up my take on gigs.
I was always too busy being at a Metal concert to pick up chicks. My wife also wouldn’t like if I brought another girl home lol
I have that same problem with my wife. I thought maybe it was just me.
almost every year for the last 7 years i’ve attended the Rockfest in Kansas City. it draws in about 50,000 people for a single day filled with 15-20 band on two stages. it’s mostly “rock” bands such as Disturbed, Korn and Godsmack with the occasional cooler band such as Killswitch Engage or Volbeat. as is normal with a crowd that size and bands of this variety there are many, many assholes. but i can tolerate stoners/drunks and people seriously lacking in good manners. but what drives me batshit crazy is the guys, usually between 16 and 35, who position themselves in the middle of the crowd at the main stage, right behind the pit, and don’t even so much as glance up at the band playing. they spend the entire day staring at girls, recording the boob flashers on the phones, mouths hanging open as they visually grope other guys girlfriends. after you add up the cost of tickets, parking, food and drink, don’t you think it would be cheaper and easier to just spend the day watching free porn on the internet? i know it would be a hell of a lot less creepy for me, because the demeanor of these guys just has roofies and date rape written all over it. and they always look like frat boys who cut the sleeves off their only black t-shirt and tied a bandanna around their head (it goes great with the white sunglasses) so they would “fit in”.
and when i first read about the MTV Bro-code blog, these guys were the first thing i thought of. dozens of them descending upon my cherished metal shows to stand there in the middle of the crowd, ignoring the band, drooling over the all the “hot chicks”, taking pictures of them on their phones and high fiving their Keystone chugging buddies.
i hate to deny bands more ticket/merch sales, but why oh why does it have to be in the form of these tools?
The only tip I have for picking up women is to lift with your legs. That’s just common sense, folks.
What if they do that weird center of gravity thing where it makes lifting them really difficult? I saw it on the TV once so it must be true.
I think there was a physicist somewhere up this comment thread. Maybe he knows.
You lift anything heavy with your legs. Center of gravity is irrelevant to this. But the general recommendation for lifting anything by yourself is – get a grip as close to the center of gravity as you can. Momentum is a bitch.
It’s been a few years since I’ve been to a show( having a baby can do that to you), but I doubt anything has changed that much. There were always women at shows. I never thought to regard them as if they were unicorns or something. Roughly half of the human population has lady parts. Is it really so odd that some of them might find their way to a metal show?
I see you’re breaking out the logic weapon. Do you have a license for that?
No. I use it recklessly and irresponsibly.