Dec 052011

Believe it or not, I try hard each day to concoct something interesting to post on this site. I try to avoid posting completely lame-ass bullshit (hereafter, “C-LAB”). Some days, avoiding C-LAB is difficult. I run out of time, or I party too hard and too late, and I do something that basically just feels like I’m showing my ass. And then some days, I feel like I’ve written something really good.

But how do I really know whether I’ve done a C-LAB post or instead something better than that, i.e.,  something that’s mainly lame-ass bullshit (“M-LAB”) but not C-LAB? Well, one way to find out is to check Google Analytics. Google Analytics is a service that gives web sites a shitload of data about their traffic. It’s mainly used by people who are trying to make money off their sites. Since we don’t advertise, and therefore don’t make shit off what we do here, I only use it to satisfy my curiosity about whether we’re dishing up C-LAB or M-LAB.

I don’t check our Google Analytics account that often, but since we’re nearing the end of the year, I thought I’d explore the data more deeply than usual. What I found really boggled my already boggled mind. I found that the third most popular post we’ve ever done since starting NCS is THIS ONE about Elize Ryd, the vocalist for a band called Amaranthe, which I posted in January 2010. Continue reading »

Jan 132010

We know you depend on us to sift through the mountains of daily metal news so you don’t have to, to separate the wheat from the chaff, and then bring to your attention only the truly vital information without which your lives would be drab, insignificant, and not worth living. A heavy fucking responsibility, but we’ve got broad shoulders and we’re up to it.

That’s why we’re telling you, hot off the presses, that Amaranthe singer Elize Ryd (pictured above) has been selected to fill the female guest singer spot on KAMELOT‘s upcoming European tour in April/May.

What’s that you say? You think this “news” is bullshit? You say you’ve never heard of Amaranthe and that with a lead singer like this, they couldn’t possibly be metal?

You say you think KAMELOT sounds like an Andrew Lloyd Webber creation? Or maybe like what would happen if Siegfried and Roy decided to start a metal band?

Basically, you’re thinking I made up this “vital breaking news” horseshit as just an excuse to put a hot piece of eye candy up on our site in a desperate attempt to lure more readers?

Well, so fucking what if I did? Just cut me a little slack. Just this once. I had a late night.

(Thank you Blabbermouth for this vital piece of news.)