One of my largely behind-the-scenes collaborators on this site (Alexis) saw my totally random use of a loris photo in a recent post and sent me the video up above. I just about busted a gut laughing at it. It’s got nothing to do with metal, and I promise I’m not going to make a habit of showing cute animal videos on this site. Just this one time. Just couldn’t resist.
I still don’t think I’d want a pet that has hands. That would make me nervous. On the other hand, I think I’d prefer the kind of tricks this loris can do to my cat’s favorite trick — which is to jump on my keyboard while I’m in the middle of writing and delete everything.
This video has 3,117,938 hits on YouTube, which is about 3,117,900 more hits than we have on this NCS site. Fucking lorises. I wonder if a video of someone scratching my pits would increase our traffic. I could make my eyes really wide while being scratched. What do you think?
I did find one related video on the YouTube sidebar after I watched this one. It’s the same loris, but at feeding time. This one is somewhat more metal. You can see what I mean — after the jump . . . (UPDATE: now with suitable musical accompaniment)
I could make a video of someone feeding me grubs. I could make my eyes really wide while eating them. Do you think that would increase our traffic here at NCS? I could lick my fingers after eating, too. What do you think?
I finally got off my lazy ass and found suitable music accompaniment for the eating of grubs. I think this song works, and not just because of the title. It just sounds right. It’s also an unusual song. Kinda catchy, in a grub-eating kind of way, and it’s a band we like and have written about before. Listen up, while you stuff yo face with squirmy things, or while you watch the video above one more time:
I think you need to share some of whatever it is you’re on today. Or maybe not on.
And what, no grub related metal to go with this?! I’m sure there’s got to be one song somewhere out there that fits.
HA! I’m just high on life, of course.
And yeah, I feel guilty I didn’t make the effort to find grub-related metal. But the night is young . . .
Finally made it back to the right computer and have added some music. And I think grub-core is as good a word for it as any!
I just found the perfect song to eat grubs to. Just have to get back to the computer where I keep my music.
Give us some porn and that will increase your hit rate.
Hey, that was a naked loris, wasn’t it? Doing a full frontal in the first clip too.
No thank you on the Loris porn. I was thinking more of Sasha Grey porn.
Sorry. The only females we can get to pose nude for this site are lorises named Sonya. And only if we feed her grubs. Or tickle her pits.
Those grubs look finger lickin good.