Apr 102013

March 2, 2010: I wrote a rare, completely off-topic post about a movie — Crazy Heart.

April 9, 2012: A new comment appeared on that post. No one would have seen this comment, except possibly for Phro, since he left the only other comment on the post — in March 2011.

Here is the recent comment by a smear of living diarrhea whose spam-bot created the name qr5mer, with my interspersed responses in yellow, since that is the color of the piss in which I would like to drown this jackass:

“Let it end up being. ‘If a cyst is smaller than average discreet, whether or not this doesn injured or perhaps scratch in case this isn reddish colored and also soft, then you could only get out only, Inches states that Jack H. Any hands-off plan is the best for any cyst.”

Pardon me for being less than average discreet, but I disagree. A hands-off plan for the cyst that you are would be the worst plan. I would like to injure you, by scratching you until you are nothing but a big reddish color, and also soft.

“[XXX url] the recognized internet site provides the nearly all precisely Eureka products and solutions, no always provde the smallest prices. There are actually cleaner deliver internet sites this have a very number of Eureka cleaner areas in addition to accessories and parts utilizing companies. Their prices are typically lower than the particular Eureka web-site, as well as best web-sites carry a range of items..”

If there are actually cleaner deliver internet sites with a very number of Eureka cleaner areas, I would like to typically lower you into those sites, but not into the cleaner areas, instead into the nearly all precisely areas where you will be burned alive.

“The terrorists had slain not one but two people this Israeli Olympic group, took 9 hostages, along with commanded the discharge plus safe and sound verse to be able to Egypt associated with 234 Palestinians and also non-Arabs jailed throughout Israel, together with a couple German born radicals presented from the The german language the penitentiary program. Israel told her simply by declaring firmly there can be zero arbitration. The French people supplied a Palestinians revenue for any turmoil the [XXX url] even so the kidnappers waived..”

You are a disgusting perversion of life as to which there can be zero arbitration nor any safe or sound verse but only a penitentiary program, whether or not in The german language.

“Make the most of Kava kava root powder also, besides other teas with regard to rest, protection, complications, and so on. I’m keen on some other makes as compared with Heavenly Seasonings, primarily for the reason that Celestial Herbs terminated his or her Frame of mind Mender their tea along with SJW that had been the very first SJW tea I had uncovered, plus the the very first thing enhanced the depressive disorders that we got lived with in my very existence getting the club getting it. I am even now angry at them to get discontinuing any particular one..”

I have a depressive disorder that I got lived with in my very existence after reading your foul gibberish and would like to terminate your Frame of mind without any Mender.

“When they are lefty, lay on their left,hermes outlet online. Should they be ambidextrous, take a seat in order that they are along the side of ones weakened hand. For anyone who is ambidextrous,[XXX url] Sale, far too,Louis Vuitton Handbags Replica, remain making sure that they may be on your quit..”

 I would like to take your seat and shove a Louis Vuitton Handbags Replica so far up it that your weakened hand can never pull it out. Sale, far too.

“A person’s your survival plan is that, ones success program. Go ahead and post a link on your home team about wikipedia or add graphics from Search engines The planet. Tend not to submit the tackle. sometimes not. Needless to say I choose to generate a disorder proof against a great antibootic, but I also learned the roll-out of innovative life using the travels and it is larve. Moray Anderson. It provokes the workers regarding organization travels.”

Needless to say, your survival plan is not a success program. Larve will eat your tackle after I’m through with you, if I could only use the organization travels to find your home team and generate a disorder against which no antibiotic will be proof. You motherfucker.

“Hence, it’s well stated that your promo conference hand bags as well as the management and business community maintain far healthier partnership. Promotional product possibly improves way up its values, commitment and also satisfaction in the specialist staff. The actual shots produced within the sides with the bag is often nearly anything. It may be a wedding image with your ex-girlfriend possessing you actually, it usually is your ex marriage ceremony graphic, or it’s really a relatives photograph. If you fail to make a decision relating to the shots you consider hiring, you can obtain the whole thing published during one bag.”

The actual shots I would like to produce within the sides of your bag are not nearly anything, but the actual shots of you being eaten alive by your relatives and your ex-girlfriend, which would improve your value way up, since your value alive and not as food is nil.


Seriously, what is the point of this shit?  Yes, the creator of this nonsense succeeded in evading the spam filter at our site, but to what end? No one is ever going to visit the very subtle and cleverly implanted links (that was sarcasm), which I have now deleted thanks to the comment by .jh below. In fact, I would have deleted this entire bullshit comment a nanosecond after seeing it, as I do with others like it, except for the fact that it gave me an excuse to vent my spleen in this post. And also because it was so hilariously bizarre.

So why? I’m sure if I could be bothered to do a bit of research on this kind of spam I would find an answer. And I’m sure the answer, somehow, some way, would boil down to money, even if I can’t fathom how there is any money to be made in doing this.

But since the answer would undoubtedly leave me even more disgusted at the many forms of maggotry that masquerade as humans than I already am, I think I’ll pass . . . and go back to writing about metal.

P.S.  I wrote this last night after going out to dinner with Mrs. Islander and having a couple of adult beverages and some red meat. Having read it again this morning, I realize that engaging in a dialogue with gibberish spam is questionable behavior. In my defense, I really enjoy seeing comments on our posts each day, but the first 5 comments I saw on the site when I got home after dinner were spam, and I kind of lost it.


  1. Fuckin weird. You should butcher Spam’s children first, while Spam watches, then sodomize Spam with the childrens severed limbs, then kill and fuck Spam. In that order.

  2. I’m still confused. If I use Kava kava kava kava powder, then I’ll be protected from kidnapping terrorists?

  3. Let’s be fair… they’re not the WORST comments we’ve received recently.

  4. writing about the spammer is kinda playing into their hands, as now this will show up in search engines and their site will get bumped in the ratings. What you should do is change all references to their site to something else to make sure they at least don’t gain any traffic or ratings.

  5. Another blog I frequent has employed a simple solution that seems to work, at least from my user-based point of view. So simple, that makes you wonder ‘why hasn’t this been used before?’. Simply add a checkbox titled “Prove that you are NOT a spammer” that you have to click in order to post.

    Just throwing it out there, in case it works for you all.

    • Thanks for that tip. I’ve just been using the built-in registration form that comes with the back-end software we use. I will see if there’s a way to customize it.

    • Genius.

      Although I also like the mental image of a flesh-and-blood spammer getting to that and going… “Well… it just wouldn’t be right to lie about it…”

  6. Moray Anderson, mentioned in the sixth entry of spammy goodness, is apparently “a well respected entomologist with many years of experience in the field.” Thank you Google for helping me learn something new today.

    Also, there was a rather complimentary bit of spam you received last night from someone using the super-metal alias of “best hodia suplement” on the A Year In Review(s): The Disappointing Albums post from back in December. It read: “Hello there, You’ve done a great job. I’ll certainly digg it and personally recommend to my friends. I am confident they’ll be benefited from this web site.” But alas, it seems you have deleted it. Now how will his friends be benifited from this site?

    Purple laser penguin detonator

  7. What’s with All of the weird capitalizations in These spam Posts?

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