Mar 292011
 

To recap:

An earthquake of historic proportions hit northeastern Japan on March 11. That triggered a massive tsunami that flooded a wide swath of the Japanese mainland. Millions were left without power, and the loss of power also caused malfunctions at a nuclear plant, which has been leaking radiation ever since. More than 9,800 bodies have been recovered so far, another 17,500 are still missing; the majority of those are probably dead. Even now, more than 600,000 homes are without water, more than 200,000 still without power. Hundreds of thousands remain homeless.

We have a faithful reader named Phro whose frequent comments make me laugh or feel queasy (or sometimes both). He’s an American living and working in the Tokyo area. On March 16, at the end of one of our more widely read posts, called “Our World”, we passed along an appeal from Phro for contributions to the relief effort in Japan. And then, in an update to the post, we explained that Phro had offered an extra inducement: if NCS and its readers could meet or exceed the goal of raising $500 for Japanese relief, Phro promised to do something inappropriate and ridiculous (e.g., wear a maid skirt and dance around akihabara) and send us photographic evidence.

We exceeded that goal — and Phro has now paid off.  (details – and photos – after the jump . . .) Continue reading »

Dec 182010
 

[EDITOR’S NOTE: We needed some kind of weekend segue between Finnish tributes and the start of NCS year-end listmania, and we decided to publish this. We may need our heads examined. And, as you’ll see, we’re not the only ones.

A couple weeks ago, I vented my spleen about “the holiday season” in a post called FUCK CHRISTMAS! This apparently inspired our regular commenter and previous guest contributor Phro to put tentacle to paper and spin out a Christmas yarn, which he says was inspired by a true story. It’s even more insane and  stomach-turning than Phro’s usual output — which is saying something. At least he didn’t indulge in any fantasies about my mom.

We’re publishing this as an act of mercy – not for Phro, but for the people he might victimize if we didn’t let him get this off his chest. It will help you to know that Phro is a U.S. ex-pat teaching English in an undisclosed Japanese town. We hope he’s teaching livestock and not actual human beings. It also occurs to us that he should go easier on whatever passes for Japanese moonshine.]

“Jingle bells, jingle bells…”

The sound echoed in my ears.  Distant and echoey and seemingly far away.  It was like the sound of my first born being murdered by a land-born octopus with razors for suckers.

“Wha…”

I was lying on the floor in a pile of vomit, blood, shit, piss, and other squishy fluids I chose not to recognize.  There were frightened children, parents, and Japanese policemen around me.  The policemen looked as frightened as the children.  They were babbling something at me in a language I knew I should know, but I was having a hard time connecting my brain to reality. (more dementia after the jump . . .) Continue reading »

Nov 102010
 

[EDITOR’S NOTE: Here we go — the first of the guest posts we’re running while I’m on vacation. And our first installment comes from our tentacle-loving bro, Phro, now stationed in some Japanese backwater and surviving on a diet of metal, Japanese poetry, and other things we’d rather not know about. He has some music to share with you.]

At first brush, Lizard Skynard might seem like a gimmick.  The name alone is absurd and evokes entirely the wrong image for the band.  After all, you are probably imagining lot lizards putting their frothy mouths on the short nubby ends of truckers right now.  But!!!  Perish that thought (you sicko) and let’s talk about something completely different.

You obviously know how to use internet, so I can assume that, like all internet denizens, you are probably a mentally deranged individual.  I will also assume you know who the Lizardman (http://www.thelizardman.com/) is.  If not, that link right there will enlighten you.  We’ll wait.  Have fun.

Okay, so now you know pretty much everything you need to know before we begin this review of the band’s self-titled debut.  The Lizardman (or Erik Sprague, if you want to be pedestrian) is the frontman for the band.  I would go so far as to say that he is the personality of the band, but we personally haven’t seen any live performances, so we’ll reserve judgement for now.  Needless to say, it is his voice that dominates and informs the songs.  And his voice is, for lack of a better term, the madness of modernity.

Okay, enough literary theory horseshit, let’s talk music!  What does it sound like? (more after the jump . . . including eels) Continue reading »