You know, if I owned a kvlt metal record label (and therefore, by definition, did not care about food or running water), I would do something like this.
The phone would ring one day, and someone would say, “Would you be interested in signing a band composed of these folks?”
Mike Scheidt (YOB)-Vocals
John Cobbett (Hammers of Misfortune, ex-Ludicra)-Guitars
Sigrid Sheie (Hammers of Misfortune)-Bass
Aesop (Fucking) Dekker (Agalloch, Worm Ouroboros, ex-Ludicra)-Drums
I’d think on it for about two seconds, while wiping the drool off my mouth, and while the inner me would be squealing like a little girl, I’d try to play it cool and ask if there was any music to hear. And upon being told Not Yet, I’d just go ahead and give up and ask where to send the contract, and then excuse myself to go change my shorts.
I’m not exactly sure it went down like that in the offices of Profound Lore. All I know for sure is that this band is a real thing, it’s called VHÖL, they’re recording an album, and Profound Lore plans to release it.