Feb 132013

Phro has reviewed the music of UK-based Chemical Tomb for us before. Amazingly, they sent him their new 7″ split with Corrupt Humanity, which was released January 15. Allegedly, you can pick it up from GRINDFATHER PRODUCTIONSBlack Lake Records, and Aural Onslaught Records & Distro. You can also stream it on Bandcamp. The cover art is by Skillmatik.

Phro delivered unto me another of his now-legendary video reviews. Go ahead. Watch it: Continue reading »

Jun 202012

(It appears Phro has taken the early results of the NCS Reader’s Poll to heart. Not the part about hand jobs or using more polite language. The part about writing more shit for NCS. Below, Phro reviews new releases by Strong Intention (U.S.), Wake (Canada), Dephosphorus (Greece), and Chemical Tomb (UK).)

Hi. It’s morning. I’m pissed about that. Also, I have three things I’d like to shove in your ear hole. Don’t worry, it won’t be a pleasant experience. Least of all for the cockroaches. Probably you’ll have the second worst time of it. Unless you’re one of these girls. Don’t worry, that’s totally safe for work if you work in the vomit porn industry. Or a daycare. Very informative for children. Teaches them the dangers of not listening when Daddy tells not to touch the drugs. (Bad Phro, no touching Daddy’s drugs.) But Phro wants to play!  Phro wants…


First up! Strong Intention’s Razorblade Express!

Daddy…uh…I mean, Islander sent me some albums for review. The first one was the Rumplestiltskin Grinder album from last week. (Great album, isn’t it?) The other two were short grindcore releases. Usually, when I think of grindcore I think of stuff like Wormrot and Circle of Dead Children. Strong Intention wear their hardcore influences a bit more prominently. In fact, like a lot of hardcore, you can actually almost make out the lyrics. I think. Pretty much all I can accurately catch is “Hate this life!” (Which is incredibly apropos this morning.) It sounds as if there’s a screaming, howling, angry wood-chipper fronting the band. (Daddy says not to play with the wood-chipper or he’ll shove my arm in to teach me a lesson.) Continue reading »

Jun 062012

(Phro reviews the 2012 free EP by “2 Polish and two English scumbags stuck in the shit hole known as Plymouth”, a/k/a Chemical Tomb.)


Can you think of any genre label more accurate to the genre it describes? Not even “death metal” carries the visceral weight of “holy-fuck-who-just-shoved-a-chainsaw-in-my-ear” that is imparted by the two syllables of “grindcore.” And when you make like a bath salt abuser (salter? bather?) and start chopping wildly at random appendages and slice off the “core,” you just get “grind”: simple and glorious like unrepentant morning wood, standing ready to fuck everything with violent dissonance.

Which brings us to my early morning discovery today: Chemical Tomb.

They seem to have a thing for pot, based on their movie samples. I forgive them because they made my ears cum and bleed at the same time. (Cleed? Blum?)

This EP, if it’s long enough to be anything more than a single, is all of 5 minutes. Perfect for a quickie before work or, if you put it on a loop, to help you get through a few rounds in a cage match. I think. I’m not actually sure how cage matches work…do they involve whiskey? They should. Everything is better with whiskey.

Anyway. The music. Well, obviously, I’m gonna just put that handy little bandcamp player after this. But maybe you’re at work and you can’t listen to music. So you need words—my words, sweaty with exertion and flush with eagerness to please—to give you an idea of what you’re missing out on. Continue reading »