BAND NAMES, BOOZE, AND YOUR MOM

 Band Name Fodder, Phro's Posts  31 Responses »
May 152012
 

(I just want to apologize in advance for the fact that Phro chose to use the privilege of having the following piece posted at NCS to write in graphic detail about fucking your mom. Because I know he would never say things like this about my mom.)

Ugg. It’s that time of year again. The sun is staying up longer, the temperatures are getting higher, the high school students who smoke dog turds and put bags of flaming pot on my porch have more free time, and, apparently, metalheads will soon be venturing out of their caves to do horrible things with their penises and vaginas in large groups. I suppose it’ll be like Woodstock, but without all the hippies with their long hair and drugs. Oh. Wait. Nevermind.

So, like a good Phro should (according to his mommy…hi, mom!), I’ve found some tours and the bands playing them and analyzed their names. I’m kinda like Tom Hanks in that one movie about Jesus having sex with the Pope crossed with Phillip Seymour Hoffman in that movie where he huffs gas fumes. Now, before we go on, I just have to say that huffing gas fumes is a horrible, horrible idea when smoking pot. There are just some things that you shouldn’t multi-task. One drug at a time, kids.

Also, I got really drunk and fucked your mom last night. Happy Mother’s Day! (I told her it was a present from you. Kinda like this.)

To the tours!

First, apparently there’s a Shockwave Tour. What a stupid fucking name. How about calling it the Brown Note Tour and handing out bullhorns for the audience to fart into? Continue reading »

CATTLE DECAPITATION STUDIO REPORT IS QUALITY ENTERTAINMENT

 Mosh Pit  1 Response »
May 142012
 

I didn’t write our review of Cattle Decapitation’s new album, Monolith of Inhumanity. That’s because I’m too busy taking care of the really important shit around here, like writing posts about Angela Gossow’s abs. But that doesn’t mean I disliked the album. Far from it. In fact, I think it’s the best album Cattle Decap have ever done and it’s one of the best albums of the year. So there: I guess that’s my review.

One part of what makes the album such a riveting listen from beginning to end are Travis Ryan’s vocals. The dude is a vocal chameleon, or perhaps a vocal schizophrenic. It’s as if he’s inhabited by multiple personalities, each of which expresses himself in a distinctive (and thoroughly insane) manner, and all of whom sound fucken killer.

Today, Cattle Decap unveiled a studio report that focuses on the vocal tracking for Monolith of Inhumanity. I guess it’s kind of putting the horse after the cart, since studio reports usually precede album releases, but I’m glad they released it because it’s very entertaining to watch. And I say that as someone who really doesn’t watch studio reports very often because I’d rather be listening to the damn music, y’know?

In addition to Ryan, the video includes the recording of the gang vocals on “The Carbon Stampede” by The Cephalic Carnage Community Men’s Choir, consisting of all current Cephalic members and alumni Jawsh Mullen and Zac Joe. It also seems clear from the video that producer Dave Otero had a lot to do with Cattle Decap’s stretching of their talents on Monolith. For which we owe a hearty THANKS MOTHERFUCKER!

Check out the video after the jump. It’s fun (and thanks to TheMadIsraeli for tipping me to this.) Continue reading »

ABS (and DEATH OF SELF)

 RANDOM FUCKING MUSIC  13 Responses »
May 142012
 

I have never seen my abs.  I will never see my abs.  It’s just not in the cards, despite the fact that I’m pretty close to the weight I’m supposed to have for my height.  Even when I was at my trimmest, most athletically fit, I couldn’t see them . . . and those days are far back in the rear-view mirror.

Angela Gossow, on the other hand, has abs. Having seen this photo taken at Arch Enemy’s Wages Of Sin Anniversary show in Tokyo on April 14, 2012, I don’t know why she ever wears shirts and tops that drop below her upper ribcage. Man, when you got it, flaunt it.

Look at her fucking arms, too! I know that with Arch Enemy as big as they are, she travels in better style than 99% of all metal bands, but still: Where does she find the time to work out this intensely, and how does she avoid all the alcohol and shit food that comes with touring?  Oh, wait.  I know.  You don’t have to fucking tell me.  It’s called self-discipline.  A concept I’ve read about, but one that’s totally academic to me.

I’m sorry, but as awe-inspiring as Angela looks in this photo, it fucking depresses me on another level. By coincidence, about 5 minutes after I saw this photo, I heard a song that kind of sums things up. It’s called “Visions Of A Shit Life”, which is kinda what I see when I catch myself naked in a mirror. It’s by a Denver grindcore band called Death of Self (yeah, that’s a fucken appropriate name, too), which features the vocalist/guitarist (Ethan) from Clinging To the Trees Of A Forest Fire. It has the benefit of being a goddamned kickass song, too. Continue reading »

A SMALL VAT OF SLUDGE: DUKATALON AND COWARDS

 RANDOM FUCKING MUSIC  4 Responses »
May 142012
 

I think it’s fair to say that I have eclectic taste in metal. I enjoy a wide range of music (as long as it has little or no clean singing, of course), and I make a conscious effort to cover a broad spectrum of genres/sub-genres in my own contributions to NCS. But that’s not to say I like everything to the same degree, and I certainly don’t claim to be well-educated in everything metal has to offer. Of course, as is true of most fans, there’s a connection between the intensity of my liking for certain styles and the extent to which I feel knowledgeable about them.

Sludge — and particularly doom-heavy sludge — is an example of a genre style that I’ve consumed only rarely, and consequently I don’t claim any expertise in the area, nor any legitimate basis for saying what’s best and what isn’t. I tend to prefer faster, more explosive music, and I’ve yet to fully appreciate the beauty of being dragged at a crawling pace through sucking tar, particularly when the music doesn’t provide the relief of at least a momentary glimpse of light or a lungful of air.

HOWEVER, I’m a riff addict, and I do love a big, heaving, massively distorted guitar-and-bass tone. I also often enjoy really ugly music that feels like an alien larval parasite eating its way through my chest and eventually exploding in a spray of blood and soft tissue. And so today, after that long wind-up, I bring you music from Dukatalon (Israel) and Cowards (France).

DUKATALON

I also enjoy eye-catching album art, and (as you can see above) Orion Landau created a real winner for the debut album by this three-man Israeli band, 2009’s Saved By Fear (which was later re-issued by Relapse Records after they signed Dukatalon). What, you may ask, am I doing writing about an album that’s two and a half years old? And the answer is: Last week Dukatalon released a music video of a live performance of a song from that album called “Vagabond” that really grabbed me. Continue reading »

THE DIABLO SWING ORCHESTRA: PANDORA’S PIÑATA

 Album Reviews, Exceptions to the Rule  15 Responses »
May 142012
 

(In this post groverXIII reviews the new album by The Diablo Swing Orchestra.)

[EXCEPTION TO THE RULE WARNING]

Quite recently, our old pal Islander asked us, “What’s in a name?” I found this pretty amusing, because I had actually planned on addressing this sort of subject in this review, albeit with a more limited scope. Specifically, I was going to address those rare instances where a band’s name is directly evocative of the music that they make. I don’t mean the sort of band names where it’s fairly easy to guess what sort of music they make, like how a band with a pluralized noun is probably a djent band, or a band with a Verb/Gerund The Noun name is probably metalcore/deathcore, or how a band with a name that doesn’t appear to be a real word is probably a black metal band.

No, as you might guess, I’m talking about a name like Diablo Swing Orchestra. I’ve been trying for a while to think of a band whose moniker is more perfectly suited to them, and I really haven’t found one. If for some reason you are unfamiliar with them, Diablo Swing Orchestra mix metal with a smorgasbord of orchestral music styles to create something that is truly unique. They have one of the most interesting back stories I’ve ever read, and while it may or may not be historically accurate, it certainly does a nice job setting the stage for their music. They live up to their name, sounding like the Glenn Miller Orchestra if they were doing a gig as Lucifer’s house band.

I’ve been following the band since I first happened upon their stunning debut, The Butcher’s Ballroom, where the mix of elements blew me away, not only because of the different styles, but also how smoothly they were mixed. DSO’s sophomore release, Sing-Along Songs For The Damned And Delirious, was certainly its predecessor’s equal, maintaining the same level of ferocious weirdness without running it into the ground. And now, we get Pandora’s Piñata, the DSO’s eagerly-awaited third album, and once again, these eclectic Swedes do not disappoint, delivering one of the year’s most creative releases thus far. Continue reading »

SÓLSTAFIR: “SHE DESTROYS AGAIN”

 Metal News  5 Responses »
May 132012
 

“She Destroys Again” is a song from Sólstafir’s Köld album, which was released in February 2009 by Spikefarm Records. When the band’s official video for the song originally went up on YouTube in 2010, it was taken down, presumably because of the full frontal female nudity. Later, it was re-uploaded and has been age-restricted on YouTube since then.

I suppose in some sort of jousting match with YouTube, it has been uploaded again today without the age restriction. I’m sure that won’t last long.

It’s a cool song and a cool video, which I was reminded about by the new upload.  The video is just a montage of still photos compiled by the band’s drummer Guðmundur Óli Pálmason using Final Cut, without any digital post-processing; he says all the visual effects were manually created. It’s interesting to watch.

I’ll embed the non-restricted version after the jump.  When it eventually gets blocked, you can go HERE to see the age-restricted cut, if you’re of age. Continue reading »

FREE SHIT: A KLONOSPHERE SAMPLER

 Free Shit  1 Response »
May 132012
 

Klonosphere is a French business devoted to organizing and promoting musical performances and releasing music, with distribution provided by Season of Mist. Their name has been associated with a number of bands we’ve featured at NCS over the years. This morning I discovered that they’ve released an 18-track sampler of music from Klonosphere bands for free download. The sampler includes music from five bands we’ve featured at NCS (each of these names are links that will take you to our features about them):

Hypno5e
Jenx
Nojia
Klone
Nami

These bands are all so good — and their music is so diverse — that it bodes well for everything else on this sampler. I haven’t listened to the whole thing yet, but I did pick out a few songs at random from bands whose names were new to me. I’ll stream those after the jump and provide a link for the download. Continue reading »

MAGOA, SWALLOWED, AND HIDEOUS DIVINITY

 RANDOM FUCKING MUSIC  11 Responses »
May 132012
 

In this post I’ve collected music from three bands I came across yesterday that I thought was worth sharing. I tried to think up some kind of Mother’s Day theme for this round-up. All I could come up with was the idea of calling all of you motherfuckers, but that doesn’t really work, does it? Anyway, for all of you whose moms didn’t kick you out of the house, don’t forget to wish them a Happy Mother’s Day. Even those of you who got kicked out might give it a try. They might let you back in.

MAGOA

This band is from France. These days, that means there’s about an 8 out of 10 chance they will be good. Magoa released a debut album last year called Swallow the Earth, which I haven’t heard. More recently, they’ve finished recording a 6-song EP that I presume will be released later this year. Last week, they released a single from the EP for free download, along with an accompanying video. The name of the song is “Animal”.

As their principal influences, Magoa cite Slipknot, Lamb of God, Pantera, and In Flames. Based on this song, I’d add Meshuggah to the list, which I suppose is a way of saying that it includes some djent stylings. I get the Slipknot reference, but based on this song I wouldn’t say the usual stylings of those other bands are much in the mix.

I do like the song — it’s groovy, it’s brash, it’s high-energy, it includes a catchy melody — but the main reason for posting about it is the video, which I couldn’t take my eyes off of. In the category of videos that exclusively depict the band performing the music, it’s one of the best I’ve seen this year. Continue reading »

LONDON HOMESICK BLUES

 Off Topic  19 Responses »
May 122012
 

Even though I live in the Pacific Northwest, I’m not a native of the region. The place where I was born and lived until I finished high school is Austin, Texas. My mother and brother still live there, and I go back there to visit a couple times a year. I’ve traveled around a fair amount, and if I could reverse time and have my choice of places to call my hometown, I’d still pick Austin.

In early April, I flew back to Texas to be at the wedding of a young woman I’ve known forever. The ceremony was performed by a good friend of mine (and hers) who got some kind of on-line minister’s license to perform lawful marriages in the State of Texas. The wedding took place outside at a farm in Brenham, Texas (which is about halfway between Houston and Austin). There were a couple hundred people in attendance on a beautiful afternoon. After the wedding, we partied hard. There was plentiful barbeque and beer and an ass-kicking band who seemed capable of playing any kind of music you could want, and playing it well . . . except for metal. But I had a fuckin’ good time anyway.

Somewhere around midnight, that band started playing a song I hadn’t heard since the Neolithic Era. There was a time when that song meant the world to me. When I first left Texas as a young idiot, I was homesick a lot, and that song reminded me of home . . . not the nasty, right-wing bastion that Texas has become in the minds of most people nowadays, but the tolerant, left-wing, dope-smoking, laid-back, open-hearted, music-loving place where I grew up.

The song was written by Gary P. Nunn. It was made famous (at least in Texas) through a live 1973 recording of the song by Jerry Jeff Walker and The Lost Gonzo Band, which appeared on an album called ¡Viva Terlingua! That whole album is chock full of win, or maybe it’s just chock full of nostalgia for a displaced Texan like myself. Gary P. Nunn was part of The Lost Gonzo Band when the album was recorded, and he, rather than Jerry Jeff, did the vocals on the song that’s the subject of this post. But I have a slight preference for Gary P.’s own recording of the song, so that’s the version I’m going to play for you right after the post.

The lyrics are awesome, so I’m including those, too — though my British friends may not find them so awesome. They’re about a Texas musician finding himself in London and missing Texas.

This is not metal — not even close — but the song has been on my mind since April (the chorus is still one of the catchiest things I’ve ever heard), I woke up thinking about it this morning, and so fuck it, I’m devoting this post to it. Continue reading »

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